I started thinking of that day on stage at Nepean High School after I watched a video posted on Facebook by Emily, a former student. Funnily enough, a former student who is now a teacher herself. In the video, comedian Christian Hull role-plays being a teacher. I winced in a few places, and laughed out loud in others. Have a look.
Watching the video made me groan, and roll my eyes, and think of all the embarrassing, cringe-worthy moments I've had in the classroom. Like the time I was teaching science. Yep, I taught science. I was qualified to teach Biology and General Science, but it was not my forté. Not by a long shot. Science classrooms have an elevated lab bench (for demonstrations) at the front instead of a teacher's desk. Elevated being the operative word here. So, I was talking to the class, writing notes on the board, turning and talking some more, and writing, writing, writing on the board, slowly working my way across the front of the class. Until I stepped off the end of the platform into mid-air. And disappeared. Well, I disappeared from the view of most of the kids, except the shocked ones in the front row looking down at me on the floor. Ha.
Then there was the time I was rushing to class, from an early morning meeting that had run late. The ten minute warning bell rang, and those of us who had a first period class had to run out while the principal was still speaking. I ran up four flights of stairs, and down a hall that stretched the entire length of the school to my classroom at the end. In high heels. The kids milling around outside my still-locked classroom door were a bit surprised when my heel caught on something, and I flew horizontally into an open locker. Ouch. That one hurt. It seems there's a lot of physical comedy involved in teaching, folks, even if it is unintentional.
|Nepean High School English department in costume for our yearbook photo, 1995|
As it transpired, the rest of the kids had lots of fun with the new unit. But it made no difference to my problems with the "five or six." At my wits end one day, I called them all out into the hall. "You know, boys, as individuals, I really like each of you," I began. "But when you're together. You're. You're," I could feel myself getting emotional. I prayed hard that I wouldn't start crying in front of them. "When you're in a group," I continued, "You're, you're ... assholes!" I finally blurted. They looked stunned. I was stunned. "Oh, crap," I thought, "I am going to be in so much trouble."
I have no memory whether they behaved any better after that. I doubt it. I was too busy worrying that their parents would find out, and tell the principal, and I would get fired. But a few years later, when my friend Elizabeth and I were at the movies and the theatre was packed, I saw four of the boys in the row right in front of us. "Oh god," I murmured, as I shrank down in my seat. Then one of them spied me. "Ms. B!" he hooted. "Guys, it's Ms. Burpee." He grinned, "Hey, remember the time in grade ten when you called us assholes? That was the best!" Ha. I still smile when I think of that.... probably the only thing they remembered from grade ten English.
|Student "good-byes" in my JMSS yearbook, 2011.|
|One student's...uh... honest message in my 1999 yearbook.|
So, yeah, that Christian Hull video started me thinking about all kinds of things. Not just about my less-than-stellar teaching moments. But about what I learned during those cringe-worthy moments. I think the most valuable lesson I learned as a young teacher was not to take myself too seriously.
And I've come to believe over the years that it's probably an important lesson for many of us. Not just for teachers. But for lawyers, and doctors, and scientists, and parents, and politicians too. We should take our job very seriously, but not be too impressed with ourselves. Not get too caught up in the old ego thing.
That, my friends, can be dangerous.
So. Do you have any cringe-y moments in your career that you'd like to share with the rest of us? Go on, we're listening.
Linking up with: Saturday Share over at Not Dressed as Lamb and Thursday Favourite Things at Katherine's Corner.